Lord have mercy.

Man.  Sorry for the lapse of posting but dang, these last couple of weeks have been kicking my booty.  I'll start by saying that my life is very good.  I'm thankful for no real issues.  Everything I am dealing with at the moment is a tiny blip on the map of my life.  I just seem to be dealing with a lot of blips at the moment and the weight of all of them combined is just exhausting me.  I'm not complaining or yelling about unfairness.  I'm saying I am exhausted and tired and in dire need of a win.    

Now I'm about to talk about a taboo topic here.  I've been researching and discussing it and dealing with it for some time and before I dared talk about it here I wanted to be firm in my position on it so I could take whatever blows or criticisms I received about it.  I have found that this topic makes people very opinionated.  Usually people who have babies (or no children!!!) and are still in the "know it all" phase of raising children where the reality of knowing nothing has yet to settle in. 

I'm talking about bedwetting.  And we are combating it in this house.  We always said that we would deal with it when it started to bother the child that was it was concerning and that time has come.

So far we have tried lifting (taking him to bed at certain times of night), I've read a couple of books, tons of articles, talked to our pediatrician, restricted liquids before bed, and tried various different natural remedies.  All of which didn't do a speck of good for any of us except raise hopes to only drop them on the ground lower than before.  Time to get crazy.  I bought an alarm.  A $100 alarm.  We are four nights in and I am as tired as I was when I had newborns.

Lacking sleep is not the best version of Crystal to come across.  I literally have to pray before I fall asleep at night to be nice to my son when he comes to wake me for help with the alarm.

I want you to know that if you are dealing with this, it is NOT YOUR FAULT.  Or your kids fault.  It's just luck of the draw.  Especially if you have boys and/or a family history of bedwetting.  1% of 18 year old, male army recruits still wet the bed.  It's just a reality of raising kids that some of us have to deal with, just like night terrors or allergies.  

I am dealing with a couple of weeks of exhaustion here.  Again, I realize this is small potatoes and I know we will get to the other side.  I'll happily review all of the products and books we used to help anyone else out there that I can.

So add to that...I am having some sort of allergic reaction to something in my environment causing a full blown rash covering my arms and legs.  So when I DO get to sleep, I don't get to sleep, I itch.  I've tried everything I can think of to get rid of it, ointments, medications, changing shampoos, etc.  Nothing.

Add to that a series of things that would never even cause a peak on the scale if these other two things weren't present...lots of snow days, paypal shipping not working, paying a huge tax bill, etc.  Everything is magnified by a rash and bedwetting.  

Remember when I said I was praying for patience in 2013?  Yeah, I'm on the verge of screaming "UNCLE!!!???". 

Prayers are appreciated.

In the mean time...any ideas for tutorials here? 
I'd love to hear what you would like to see?

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22 comments:

Jeanette said...

Ugh! Not easy having a bed wetter. I was blessed with having two children who can hold it forever. My son quit wetting the bed before he was a year old. He hated to be wet. We have friends whos girls wet the bed until they were 10. He is still young. I know I'm no help. Sorry! I will be praying for him and you. It will get better.

gina said...

I dont have ant experience with this but have you tried over the counter medication? Just a thought. Do the drs think he will outgrow it? Do most kids? I hope you find a resolution and get some sleep soon - hugs -

Eckmama said...

I'm sorry for your struggles. I totally understand how lack of sleep magnifies everything! There's a book I'd like to recommend to you (along with a highlighter!), called Gut and Psychology Syndrome by Dr. Natasha Campbell-McBride. It's an amazing book, filled with mind-blowing information about how our bodies work. Please don't let the title be a deterrent; I promise there's good stuff in there! I'll keep y'all in my prayers. My good friend recently went through this with her sons (older boys--10-ish), I'll ask and see what finally worked for them.

Jacomijn said...

Alas, I can't help you in the bedwetting area, but could your rash have anything to do with all the stuff you have going on at the moment? I know a couple of people who get rash when they are having a lot on their plate (stress) and a lack of sleep.

Amy said...

I've struggled with hives as well & ended up on an antihistamine cocktail. Doctors are often not helpful with these situations but out of desperation I saw an allergist & the nurse practitioner was amazing. She was very compassionate & got me turned around. Praying things ease up for you all.

SarahinSC said...

Sleep deprivation is not good!

My 11-and-a-half year old son has been accident free at night for seven days...the longest he's EVER gone. We've tried everything, short of the alarm, and nothing has worked. We've taken him to a pediatric urologist...everything structurally is fine. The advice we've always been given is just wait it out. Staying dry at night will eventually happen when his brain gets the signal from his bladder. As you might guess, being 11 and wetting the bed every night isn't that great.

We don't make a deal out of it at all. He puts his own sheets in the washer and makes his own bed every night. He hates it as much as we do.

For us, MAYBE there is an end in sight!

Don't give up hope! If the alarm is causing you a good deal of stress, perhaps consider doing away with it and just wait for your son's body to regulate itself. From a mom who's been where you are, I know that's easier said than done!

Victoria said...

Oh my, sounds like a lot on you at one time! Will be praying for you today.

Jennifer said...

So sorry you are having a rough time...{hugs}

My younger brother was a nighttime bed-wetter until he was 8 or 9. My parents had the alarm thing too... I have vivid memories of the alarm going off in the night and running to his run yelling, "JOHN WAKE UP! YOU ARE GONNA PEE YOURSELF!" Haha! We laugh about it now, but at the time I know my parents too were at their wits end. He did grow out of it, nothing anyone did made it better, it was just a time issue and a developmental issue. A pediatrician told my parents that the part in his brain had not developed fully yet that told his kidney's to slow urine production at night.

And that stinks about your rash... ugh, those are miserable. Hoping you have better days ahead.

rebecca said...

I totally know how you feel...honestly! Our first son wet the bed nearly every night till he was almost 9! This was a heavy wetting...thru pull-ups/goodnights. Plus he has night terrors, so most of the time he'd be having one of those when he discovered he was wet. Thank God we are over that hurdle!! Our second (girl 7rs)still wets, but not as often or as heavy. Thankfully she does not have night terrors and is "calm" when she wakes up wet. It so hard! It's embarrasing and frusting for them and us! Hang in there! Like you said, it's not their fault or yours!! :)

Unknown said...

Wow, I didn't know that about bedwetting....I'm sorry you're going through this, sorry for the boys as well. =( Hang in there Mama.

Joy Morris said...

We have boys about the same ages I think (5.5 & 3). My 3yo stays dry pretty much every night, but my 5.5yo struggles with it bedwetting too. It varies how often. We've had up to a couple weeks with no incidences and then a week where it happens every night. During the day, both boys can hold their bladder for super long periods of time, but it doesn't seem to transfer to night time for the older one. I'd love to hear what you've tried and what works (if you get it figured out).

Jennifer said...

My oldest, now almost 10, wet the bed consistently until he was almost 8. We're talking 4/5+ nights a week. And honestly, I was so frustrated by it, but the doctor said she wouldn't worry about it unless it was still happening AT THIRTEEN!!!! Her question was always, "Is it better than it was a year ago?" A year ago. Such a slow rate of improvement! Ugh.

He had potty trained super easy at 26 months, his issue was that he slept soooo deeply that his body simply did not wake him up when it needed to pee. We limited his drinks, we tried to take him to the bathroom in the middle of the night (we could never actually wake him up, he would sleep through the entire process, and of course, never pee in the potty). It was so frustrating, especially when his younger siblings all started staying dry through the night, then his friends (many also late bedwetters) were now staying dry.... He was the last of the group. We just kept hanging in there, buying the expensive nighttime diapers that could hold an 8 yr old amount of pee.....

Basically, none of that is helpful to you, just I-feel-your-pain right now. I will say, at one point when he was mostly staying dry, a conversation included "sometimes my bed is so warm" and at that point, I was pretty sure the few remaining wet diapers were not "accidents." So, I took him to Target and we looked at how much his diapers cost. ($20) Then we shopped all through the toy department and oohed and aahed over what $20 would buy. Then when we were ready to leave the store, I handed him $20. I told him I was not buying his diapers anymore. He could finish the package we had at home but if he needed more diapers than that, he would need to use the $20 I had given him. If he ended up not needing diapers anymore, then that $20 was his to keep! Worked like a charm, we never even finished the package we already had at home, and he got to keep the $20. However, I *only* did this because I was almost 100% certain that the issue was now in his control. Because I know for the longest time, it had *not* been in his control.

Hang in there! It's not his fault, it's not your fault. This too shall pass!

Kate said...

So sorry to hear you're having a rough go of it lately. Sometimes when you're in the trenches, it doesn't really matter how deep it is--it's still a trench.

I have a tutorial thought, though, after seeing all your beautiful Instagram photos of the cookies you make. Could you share the recipes you use for the cookies and icing and then a little something about that style/method of decorating? I love it and am curious to hear how you package the cookies without all that work going to waste.

Gordostyle said...

I hope your days get better and easier SOON! Just thought I'd mention a product that I swear by: http://www.lovelyskin.com/products.asp?MID=178&REF=GGL&SHOW=48&gclid=CNzW7brV5LUCFQk4nAodCzgApw I went to my derm. and she recommended it for some reaction (allergy?) that I was having with my lips. It cured my 3 month problem in 24 hours. She also gave me some for my 1 yr. old for his eczema on his cheeks. Other than this product she swears by pure petroleum jelly for both my lips and his eczema. Might be worth a try... goodluck and keep looking up. :o)

Smiles,
Jen

jane said...

There is a light at the end of the tunnel.. just remember that. :) My friend swears by raisins, she feeds her daughter raisins about 1 hour before bedtime and she hasn't had an accident in over 2 months. Not sure if it is the raisins or she just happened to outgrow it right at that time. If you haven't already tried this get some Benadryl Extra Strength Spray that you spray directly on your rash. My son is allergic to dogs and when he pets them (who can resist) he breaks out in a rash and the spray starts to relieve the symptoms immediately. Hope that this or something else helps you soon!

Kathy said...

Could the rash be hives/urticaria? I had them last year. Now, looking back I think they were stress-related. Allergy meds were the only thing that made me sane!! Perhaps you could try Benadryl since your rash is bothersome at night. Good luck, I feel you're pain!

Julie Paoli said...

We had the same problem and my son just did not wake up when he went at night. He toilet trained early but was never dry at night.
Our ped. recommended the "potty pager" He finally asked if he could have it so I bought it. It is a slient vibrating alarm and they have a 30 money back guarantee. You will know in the first week if it will work. The idea is it wakes them WHEN they are peeing and then their body will begin to notice the urge at night. It took 3 weeks for no more night wetting. It was by far the best $75 I had spent and turned out to be cheaper than pull-up for the long term.

Charlotte said...

My oldest child wet the bed for what seemed like forever. We had her checked out to be sure everything was okay physically (it was). The doc said up to a certain age it's impossible for most kids to control their bladders while asleep. She was well past that age, and we found it distressed her even more to worry with the alarms and changing sheets, etc. So we put her in pull-ups until she was too big for them, and then moved on to the ones they make for adult incontinence. Yes, it lasted that long. But eventually, it stopped. Absolutely fine now, and the pull-ups kept all of us rested, peaceful, and dry. Just a thought. Best of luck to you in whatever way your family chooses to deal with this.

csmith said...

I do NOT miss the days when my house smelled like pee ALL. THE. TIME. Four of my ten kids were longterm bedwetters. The kids that didn't wet were all dry at night by 3 or 4 years old and the others just weren't. I will give you my two cents just because I have been there and tried everything. There's nothing you can do. Barring an underlying medical or emotional issue all you can do is wait for their body to mature. My kids that wet all stopped between 10 and 11 years old, nothing we tried sped that up. Get really good mattress protectors, double sheet the beds so the child can strip them and have a clean sheet at night, and teach them to help with their laundry, it really makes them feel like THEY are handling the problem.

Paula said...

My daughter (now 27 years old) wet the bed until she was seven. We took her to the doctor and he asked her if she thought she was ready to stop wetting the bed. She said she was and he gave her a prescription for imipramine. She took it for a month and it worked fine. He asked if she was ready to stop the medicine and she said yes, and never wet the bed again. Imipramine is a mild antidepressant and also works on the sphincter muscles of the bladder. I think she had some emotional issues (a newborn baby brother) as well as some mechanical bladder problems. Whatever it was, it worked. No shame, no blame. I always tried to be matter of fact about getting up, changing sheets, etc, in case it was an attention-getting ploy (it wasn't). She also sucked her thumb until she caught pinworms and it grossed her out so much, she never sucked her thumb again.

The Perfect Trio said...

I've shared with you before...I have two bed-wetters. One is four, the other is eight. My eleven and five year old are dry at night. I was a bed-wetter. I guess that's why I'm not concerned. I outgrew it and know they will too. Goodnights help me maintain my sanity as far as mattresses and laundry is concerned. I would be nutty if I had to wash wet sheets everyday. :0)

Chin up. It'll resolve itself.

Bunnyslady said...

Keep your chin up; you will get through this. I have a lot of issues with my skin. Sometimes when I am so itchy that I can't stand it; I take a really hot shower. I keep the itchy part under the water as long as I can stand it. I know that this can dry out your skin, but sometimes it is the only thing that helps. Also, the best moisturizer that I have found that doesn't seem to bother my super sensetive skin is the coconut body butter from The Body Shop. You can find it at Ulta now in smaller sizes. It is a little pricey; but it works and lasts a long time. I hope this helps.

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