a little recap...

I wanted to thank you again for all of the support and love you have shown me since my posts about my childhood.  Part one is HERE part two is HERE if you haven't read them.

If you were a person with a relatively normal childhood you may not understand the significance of those posts.

The fact that I spoke, out loud, about things that were wrong and unjust was huge.  It's hard to explain the hold that someone manipulative can gain over you.  It's like being frozen but being fully conscience of what you want (and need) to do.  It's like being a prisoner with invisible restraints.

I understand what it's like to be the battered woman unable to leave.  You become stuck.  You are broken down to a point where you can no longer walk.

Writing those posts and sharing them was me throwing off a huge boulder.  I literally sighed as I hit publish.  Even though I feared {and still do} retribution for it, I know that giving it a voice makes me stronger and my past weaker.  It paves the way to healing.  I'm walking a little more free today. 

I'm thankful for all of you who wrote and commented.  Especially those who can relate or are passing my words onto an active alcoholic.  I really hope and pray they make a true difference.

And for those that think I shared too much or I should have stayed quiet or that I should leave the past in the past.  Well,  I'm not exactly sure what to say to you.  But for me, secrets kept in the dark grow.  Hurts and pain become magnified in the darkness.  Keeping quiet magnifies shame.  I KNOW that me sharing my story has helped others and if you think I need to keep quiet because authentic transparency makes you uncomfortable....well that's between you and the Father.  I pray you can figure that our for yourself.

So before I moved on to the more fun posts I have planned I just wanted to say these few words. 

Thank you for reading and thank you for hanging out with me all these years.


Unknown said...

Sharing definately helps and you should never keep stuff 'inside'. It can help so many people who feel they are totally alone to realise that there are other people who have suffered the same and who have come through the other side and now lead happy lives. I am lucky enough to have had a lovely childhood, so cannot begin to imagine what you went through. I am glad you had the courage to write about your life and would encourage anyone else to do the same. There are always people that will comment negatively, we are all so different but well done to you x Sue x

Stel said...

Brave girl.

Unknown said...

First of all, this is the first time I've come across your blog (I found you through Instagram) and I have to say I love it! I want to try your quilted feather project ASAP!
Secondly, you are INCREDIBLY brave. Not only for sharing your story but for being strong and coming out on top. I love that you have accepted your life and don't put blame on God or hold grudges on those you've lost along the way. I give you all the respect in the world. Thank you for sharing your story.

SK said...

The counsellor I saw after the birth of my first child helped me understand that saying things out loud takes away their power.

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