what i wish num 19.

Welcome to "What I wish I could tell you"...an anonymous platform for bloggers to share what they don't feel free to share on their own blogs.  If you have a story/thought/ache/hurt/feeling/secret/prayer request you want to get out, feel free to email me at ricracandpompoms @ gmail.com.  You will remain anonymous to all but me unless you choose otherwise. 
The author of this entry has chosen to stay anonymous.  Say hello to anon #19 (holly): 

~*~

I wish I could write this story on my own blog because I feel it is important, however the pain for my family is too fresh so I will openly share it here, but for now details won't be discussed on my own blog.  I want to tell you all that I have 4 wonderful, amazing, and loving children.  However one of them I did not give birth to.  In fact she has only been living with us for a little over a year.  However I am related to her.  She is 11 years old and she is my half-sister.  I am her legal guardian.  I want to tell you that her story is not pretty.  It is one of intense pain.  My baby sister was the victim of sexual abuse.  Her abuser was her own step father.  I know that doesn't sound like a uncommon story, but her story is a little different than most.  You see, she told someone.  She told her best friend and that brave little girl told her mommy and her mommy called my sister's dad.  After that the police got involved right away and within 24 hours my sister was removed from the home and sent to her dads house.  The next day we were trying to get all of our kids to their games and parties and such when I got a phone call.  It was also Halloween.  I was in shock.  We found friends to watch our own kids and we drove 2 towns over to the department of children's services to be with her.  When we got there we found out that her stepfather had just been arrested as he confessed to his crime and they had it on recording.  I haven't even gotten to the worse part of our story.  Our mother was there.  She was in another room.  The case worker pulled me aside and informed me that our mother was in complete denial and she had decided to support her husband even after his confession.  She still supports him today having almost no contact with us.  The case worker also informed me that she needed to find a safe place for my sister and that her dad was not suitable because he is not in the best health so we may be the only option.  Of course we said yes.  I want to tell you that as soon as she was out of that bad place that everything was great, but I can't.  I will fast forward to the present.  It has been over a year since that horrible day.  My sisters step father opted to a jury trial that involved getting my sister on the stand within 2 feet of him to testify to what he had done to her.  Several of the jury members were in tears.  I want to tell you how brave she was and how my heart broke for her while she was curled up on the floor of the witness room sick at her stomach from the thought of being anywhere near him.  I want to tell you that he was sentenced to 20 years in prison after being found guilty of his crime with no chance of parole.  I want you to know that does NOT erase the pain of what he has done to our family.  If you think that my sweet sister was the only victim here, you are wrong.  Myself, my husband, and my own children are also victims.  I want you to understand that this has been a VERY hard year on my family and at times I wanted to give up.  I would be lying if I said I didn't.  I am sure that some might wonder why I would want to tell my story.  I tell it because I want you to know that one of the best ways to prevent child abuse is to educate our children.  If you think that this can't happen to your family then you are wrong.  It can happen to anyone no matter where you live or how much money you have.  It doesn't have to involve a step parent either.  The statistics for children of abuse are not good.  I pray every day that we are doing the right things for my sister to keep her from continuing to be a statistic.  Girls who are sexually abused are 25% more likely to become pregnant as teenagers.  About 30% of abused children will continue the cycle by abusing their own children.  You can read these and more statistic here .   I want to you to know that you can play a huge role in protecting your own children from abuse.  Last I want to tell you that I am not this great and wonderful person for taking my sister in.  I have lost count of how many of our friends and family have told us that, but we didn't take her in so that people would say nice things about us.  We did it out of love.  We love my sister as we love our own children.  I hate what she has been through, but it happened and I have to believe that God sent us all through this storm for a reason and my hope is in Him.

  She was OK with not being anonymous. :) Go say hi and encourage her. :)
~*~

Want a turn to share?  Email me at ricracandpompoms @ gmail.com. 
Feel free to comment and encourage or just relate and assure.
Pin It!

5 comments:

Karen said...

I thank the writer for sharing this powerful story and I thank Crystal for giving people this platform.

But Crystal -- I'm not sure if this is supposed to be anonymous, as stated at the top, because there is identifying information at the bottom of the post.

Alicia said...

Such an awful story...i wish it weren't true. Is this supposed to be anonymous? I ask because her name and blog are listed at the bottom.

Tanna said...

I am so sorry that you are dealing with this. Terrible that your mother isn't there to support you through this. My thoughts are with you.

The Byron Family said...

good for you for telling your story. It doesn't matter if it was told on your blog or not...it is told. Now one more person has the courage to tell their story. I hope things continue to heal...though it will be something that will haunt that poor girl for the rest of her life.

Estee said...

I know many women who suffered abuse as a child, I myslf was abused by my ex-husband. This story brought tears to my eyes...

I admire you for doing the right thing.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
01 09 10 11 12
Blogging tips